So first of all, Happy New Year everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful holiday season. (Incidentally, happy birthday Colin Morgan! Stay gorgeous, darling.)
I decided that my New Year's resolutions are to be a better student and exercise more regularly. Not the most exciting of resolutions, but very necessary in my case.
So because fandom > real life, I'll start with that. So first of all, I know lots of people hated the Merlin finale, but honestly, I kind of liked it. I mean, let's face it, that was probably the slashiest episode they have ever given us. And this way they didn't completely destroy the legend. But I guess I understand why people have problems with it. After all, they fucked with canon quite a bit, but they have a problem keeping Arthur alive? But meh. I thought it felt okay, and since the series had to end anyway, I'm okay with it ending how it did. They did kind of open it up for us to keep writing reincarnation fics for as long as we want. Now that the whole modern-day Merlin thing is canon. It did freak me out a little to see a truck on Merlin though, not going to lie.
Also, because it was my break, I started (and finished) watching Teen Wolf. And actually, I kind of love it. Mainly because of Stiles, I think. Guys, I can't tell you how much I love Stiles. Why did I never watch this show before? Lydia, please open your eyes, woman! Although if she doesn't (I really would like Lydia/Jackson if it wasn't for Stiles), I'm okay with watching the Stiles/Derek UST forever too. I do have some problems with this show, but on the whole I think it's cute and it flows pretty well. The plot gaps I noticed in the first season were filled in the second season, and it looks like the plot gaps I found in the second season will be filled next season.
And as for the Vampire Diaries... the whole Stefan/Elena/Damon triangle is getting annoying at this point. At any point, whichever one she's with, I want her to be with the other person. But I just really want her to make up her mind, because I'm pretty sure she's going to choose Stefan in the end, and she really needs to stop fucking around with Damon's heart. But honestly, that's a little secondary to me because I am definitely watching the show for Klaus right now. I feel like every time the poor boy gets a little closer to humanity, it's ripped away from him a little bit more. But even after he massacred all those hybrids, I still just felt bad for him. And I want Caroline to get her shit together and dump Tyler, man! He just annoys me these days and Caroline could definitely make Klaus a better person if she'd just give him a CHANCE.
Not sure if Toby is evil or not on Pretty Little Liars... but if he is, that is some serious bullshit. Dude, he's going to break Spencer's fucking heart with his little shenanigans. Although if he is evil, I need Wren to come back and heal Spencer's broken heart... Wren/Hannah is utter crap and I won't stand for it. Hannah belongs with Caleb and that is the end of that. Less than a week to go till the next episode, though.
Gossip Girl is spiraling downwards quickly, man. I'm still on like episode 3 of this season, but I'm not liking where it's been going lately. Blair needs to stop being so defined by the guy she's with, I feel like she's way too one-dimensional nowadays. I was totally on board the Blair/Dan from like season 3 onwards, but the way they did it was all wrong and I was dying for her to go back to Chuck by the end of it. Rufus/Ivy is creepy and came from nowhere. And I hear that the end ship is Serena/Dan, which I hate, mostly because I really just hate Serena. I feel like everyone's personality has just gone to shit on that show, even Dan, who I previously loved. It's at the point where I really only am okay with Nate's personality, mainly because he has almost none to begin with. I've been steering clear of all the spoilers regarding who Gossip Girl is. I heard Kristen Bell came on set for the last few days of shooting, and I was so excited, because I thought since she voices Gossip Girl, it was her, but apparently, it isn't. I call bullshit. When you have an amazing actress like Kristen Bell on set who already voices the character, why not just make her the character? But hey, what do I know. I'm just the humble audience.
Must catch up on this season of Doctor Who. College has left me so behind! But anyway, on to my real life news, which is much more disturbingly pathetic than all of my fandom obsessions combined.
So I may have been annoying you all with my relationship woes for quite a while, but all of that is over and done with now. That girl I thought he was cheating on me with? Yeah, he was. For the entire two years we were together. They're together now. How did this come about? I found them hooking up at my birthday party. On my birthday. It really just about ruined my birthday, but at least I finally found out what was going on, once and for all. Of course, I had barely any time to be down about it before finals week, but I got through it somehow without screwing up too badly in school.
Me and him were still on okay terms though, because he begged and pleaded to stay friends, so we were still hanging out a lot. But then, on Dec 21st, he had his flight back to Kuwait leaving from New York. He told me his flight was early morning on Friday, so he was taking a bus to New York on Thursday night so that he could go straight to the airport. This was all very well until his mom called me on Friday morning in a state of panic, asking me where he was because he wasn't picking up his phone. I'm on really good terms with his mom, but she never knew that we were together or anything like that (it's an Indian thing). So I was like, "Well, maybe he's already boarded, isn't his flight leaving in a bit?" and then she told me that his flight wasn't until that night. He had told her that he would take a bus to New York in the morning. So basically I found out that he went to New York to spend the night with his new girlfriend (who studies there) and he lied to both me and his mother about his bus and flight times so that he could be with her.
So I was pretty pissed off about the whole thing, so I told him that if he was going to lie about things like that, then I didn't really feel like talking to him. He just replied saying "Give me one good reason why I should have told you the truth, you wouldn't have even found out if my mom hadn't called you." So I just told him that he was a fake friend and I didn't want to have any of those in my life, and I haven't spoken to him since. He did send a message saying "Happy New Year, I miss you," to which I just replied "Happy New Year." and left it at that.
I was really cut up for a long time about this, but being home gave me a lot of perspective into the whole thing and I realized that I really didn't enjoy how I was becoming defined by my relationship with him anyway. Like his interests always overshadowed my own, we always hung out with his friends and did whatever he wanted to do. Now that I don't have to answer to him anymore, I've had a lot more time to do things on my own terms. The only thing is, while at school, it's hard to find a new friends circle. We were all one big group, and while my old friends are still my friends, it's harder to meet them, because we always just hung out at his apartment, which is something I can't really do anymore. So I miss out a lot on our group interactions and it's been really hard to adjust to being on my own more and more. It's almost like I had to deal with losing him and my support structure at the same time.
My friends at home have been so great, though. I hung out with them a fair bit over this break and it was so refreshing to just goof off and have a good time with them. My personality doesn't change, per se, when I'm with different people, but there are small nuances. I think I'm definitely most myself around my high school friends, and it was great to be able to do that again. Also, I think telling them (and my parents) about what happened with my ex was great closure- I know that I won't be tempted to get back together with him now that I've told them. While I can forgive a lot of things, I know the people close to me won't be so quick to forgive him. They would never support me getting back together with him, and telling them was a way for me to finalize it for myself. Otherwise I would have always had that hope that we could work through things and sort it out and get back together. That's why I was always reluctant to tell them about any of our problems throughout the time we were still together, even though we were always on and off. But now, I feel ready to move on.
I've already had a few offers from some guys I know, but I'm taking it easy for now. It's a little hard for me to imagine being with anyone else right now. I'd rather just enjoy being single and rediscovering my own personality right now, rather than looking around for a replacement. Yes, I miss the security and comfort that comes with being in a long-term relationship, but I am definitely a lot less stressed now that the constant fights are gone.
In other real life news, the semester starts next Monday, so I'm leaving to go back to school this Saturday. I've been enjoying myself at home quite a lot, catching up with friends and my old TV shows, but I'm looking forward to going back. I feel a little lost still, but also a bit like new, so I want to see how I manage my next semester. I'm pretty sure I can do it. I'm really looking forward to classes, I was stuck with all chemistry courses last semester, but I have mostly biology and lab courses this semester, which is definitely my stronger point. Plus I'll be putting in at least 10 hours a week on my research, so I'll be super busy, but I will finally be busy doing things I actually enjoy, which is rather different from the usual.
Ta, kiddos! Gotta run to my brother's tae-kwon-do now...